Following

Table of Contents

1 - An invitation 2 - The Investigator 3 - Tunnels and Voices 4 - Sethian Skin 5 - The Deal 6 - The Rules 7 - Gray Watch 8 - Thrice-Turned Coats 9 - Mask, Coat, Skin, Bone 10 - Eye, Scar, Face, Mask 11 - Pharaul 12 - Screaming Dawn 13 - A Tale Of... 14 - The Maniaque Feast 15 - From Oblivion's Throat 16 - Mythspinning 17 - Myth of a Warm Coat 18 - A Web of Bargains 19 - Questions (End of Book 1) Book 2: The Roil and the Rattling 20 - What Began in September 21 - On Going Home 22 - Mothers' Blessings 23 - Across the Warring Lands 24 - To Sell the Lie 25 - The Sound on the Stone 26 - Miss Correlon's Return 27 - Avie 28 - The Grim Confidant 29 - The Writhewife 30 - The Rattling 31 - Code Six Access 32 - The Secret Song 33 - The Broken Furnace 34 - You Can Fix Yourself, But... 35 - ...You Can't Fix the World 36 - In the Sickle-Sough Spirit 37 - We Will Never Have Any Memory of Dying 38 - Predators in the Seethe 39 - Though Broken, the Chain Holds 40 - Seven Strange Skulls 41 - None of Us Belong Here 42 - In an Angolhills Tenement 43 - The Guardian Lions 44 - Still Hanging on the Hooks 45 - Where Have We Been? Why? To What End? 46 - Ten Million Murders 47 - Breaking the Millenium's Addiction 48 - What Does it Mean, to Leave Alive? 49 - Whether You Meant it or Not 50 - Beneath the Shroud of Sapience 51 - Beneath the Shroud of Sapience 2 52 - Seven Days 53 - The Beacon on the Haze 54 - Sixteen Days 55 - The Day Before Their Dying Begins 56 - The Day Before Their Dying Begins 2 57 - Ghost in the Crags, Blood on the HIll 58 - What Ends in December 59 - What Ends in December 2 60 - What Ends in December 3 61 - The Betrayers 62 - Bend to Power 63 - How to Serve the Everliving 64 - A Turncoat's Deal

In the world of Sof Sator

Visit Sof Sator

Ongoing 801 Words

21 - On Going Home

1969 1 0

Wednesday, September 18

Amo was on the streets at dawn, pink light diffuse through the blizzard and the clouds of steam as a city full of boilers rumbled and hissed to life. Amo dodged autocarriages in the streets as they hurried from the cathedral where they lived with Sgathaich to the officer housing near where Pharaul’s southern walls were lined with cannons to fire into the Rhyqir valley below. Just past a road lined with the armored autocarriages of Pharaul’s horseless cavalry, Amo hopped over a decorative railing and clicked their knuckles against a window wet with melted ice.

When the window opened, the heat from inside billowed out, and Indirk squinted sullenly at the dawnlight. Her hair was a tangled mess like iron shavings magnetized to her scalp, her eyes dark. “Fuck off. I’m hungover.”

“We ship out in two hours,” Amo smiled. “Put your pants on. I’ll buy breakfast.”

Once Indirk had a plate of eggs and steamed root vegetables next to a cup of steaming coffee, the café a warmly quiet murmur beneath the gurgling of the boiler pipes on the walls, Amo reached across the table and rested a hand on Indirk’s arm. “Need to ask you something.”

She stiffened and straightened some, frowning deeply. “You better not say you’re in love with me or something.”

Amo shook their head. “You wish. No. Serious question. Why’d you say you’d never see it again?”

Indirk had tossed a red woolen hat over her head instead of doing her hair, and it bunched up a bit when her brow knotted. She pushed Amo’s hand off her arm. “What are you talking about?”

“The blizzard. The avalanche. You said you’d never see it again.” Amo joined their hands on their own coffee. People came and went, a parade of coats of all kinds, be they great swaths of dyed wool or stiff columns of fur-lined suede, drinking quick cups of coffee or leaving with paper-wrapped pastries full of meat and cheese. Amo said, “Indirk, you’ve gone on missions before, and you’ve come back. You just got back. You’ll get back again.”

“I know that,” she said in annoyance. “I was drunk.”

“Which makes you honest. Something slipped out, right? Something you didn’t mean to say?”

“Fuck.” Indirk looked at the ceiling, then looked out the window. The view out this window had changed while she was gone. There had once been a library across the street, a schoolhouse beside it. The magic weapons of the Nor Sator League – wielded seemingly by sorcerers of Gray Watch – had swallowed those buildings whole. Now Indirk looked out on ground with craters cut out of it, the perfectly circular bites taken by the war, and beyond that to where some blue sky peeked through the clouds of the blizzard. She said, “You know, it is possible to know things about the future.”

“Maybe if you’re a sorcerer,” Amo said flatly, blinked at Indirk’s deepening frown, and then said, “Oh, you serious? Nobody in this city has that kind of magic. Not even Sgathaich.”

“Call it a gut feeling, then.” Indirk shrugged. “I don’t think I’m gonna die or anything. But every time I get sent out there on a mission, I get less time when I get back. I get sent out again so quick. I was only back for a few days this time. Maybe now I don’t even come back at all. Maybe I get stuck. Maybe I don’t get back. Maybe I won’t want to come back.”

“Wait, what?” Amo shook their head. “Won’t want to? Why wouldn’t you want to? You love Pharaul.”

“You love Pharaul. You love this place so much, don’t you? So much you can’t understand that maybe it’s okay to not come back?”

“I… Hey.” Amo tapped the table. “Hey, this isn’t about me. What are you talking about? Remember, I’m going with you this time. We’ll be out there together. We’ll be okay.”

Indirk groaned in exasperation, muttering, “By Wind and Sunfire, Amo, I fucking love you, but I’m…” She brushed at her face. “I’m not scared, Amo. I’m not worried. I just get the feeling that maybe I’m not coming back to this place this time. And I might be okay with that.”

“I don’t understand.” Amo searched her expression for some clue. “Why’s it okay to not come home?”

Indirk pondered and looked at her coffee, which was already getting cold. She looked at the frost on the windows. She said, “I think that’s enough.”

“Huh?”

“It’s okay if you don’t understand why it’s okay. You don’t need to. Just.” She stood. “Just don’t worry about it. Stop thinking so damn hard about everything. We’ve got to leave. Go say goodbye to your mom. I’ll see you in a couple hours.”

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